I was thinking about races, ultras of course, and I found out why they appeal to some. While editing my last video, Rabid Raccoon I noticed I filmed a lot of aid stations. I love capturing interactions with people. Aid station workers are a different breed, they are in the “supporting” role all day. Supporting, odds are, people they don’t know. They will feed you, fill your bottles, and maybe even fix your feet. All of this so you can complete YOUR race. It’s comical we pay to do this, but I see why. You spend a DAY being pampered and in the spotlight. You are “supported” for an entire day. It’s an all-you-can-eat buffet of subpar food, I mean don’t get me wrong, aid station food is amazing, but it’s a quick and easy fare. It was the attention I got that I noticed in the video. Each aid station went all out as they put all effort into meeting your needs.
Are ultrarunners just seeking attention? Am I just seeking attention? If you are reading this, on a blog I own and post my random thoughts, the answer is yes. Putting that topic aside, that has to be part of the draw to racing. Racing puts the spotlight on you. If you have kids, work a demanding job, or have lots of stress, it can be an escape to get the attention you so desperately seek. Running by the cheering crowds you feel as though they’re all there for you. You are the star, you get the attention and the fame, and MAYBE you go home with the medal!
I used to race constantly, initially part of me chasing that spotlight. I felt as though I had no talent and found something I was good at. I raced a lot and won a lot and it was addictive. Kids and a job came, priorities shifted, and I enjoyed being out there longer. The more time with your thoughts. The more time you suffer. I enjoyed that and the solitude of running. It’s bizarre, that it went from racing surrounded by crowds to racing alone in the woods with just your thoughts. Running for myself has changed so much, I’ve changed, and that’s what this sport does. Running doesn’t change, but you change along the ride. You shift from being supported by crowds and fans, to being supported by a select few. You have to think differently as time passes. It’s ever-evolving much like life. Ultras and life are messy, difficult, challenging experiences that demand you to change as the race goes on. What worked in the beginning in the race of life, doesn’t work as well in the later stages. The game changed just as you think you’ve figured it out.
You shift as we age from being supported to supporting others. I realized you can’t always take without giving back, you have to spend time supporting. There’s a balance that must be maintained for sanity, friendships, and relationships to stay afloat. Taking time to help others, as much as you have been helped. As my running career enters its next stage I’m just happy to be out on the trails. I never take for granted all those who helped me get to this point in life, my family, friends, and all those races. I am just trying to figure out what the next chapter will look like. Maybe it’s helping others find meaning through movement. I feel this strain to give back. How can I give back? That’s what I have been asking myself. I am slowly figuring it out and seeing what part to play in the running community. It just takes a lot of time, and I’m OK with that. I used to think change happened fast, but I was wrong. It’s slow. REALLY slow, if not years to get to where you need to be. You just have to take that first step!
Thanks for reading, if you enjoyed it let me know how running has changed for you over the years, or how it has stayed the same. There’s no right or wrong answer.
