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Tag: Ultra marathon

Ultra Death

Ultra Death

Published by Patrick Durante on April 9, 2025

I shouldn’t be here. Years ago, while training for a triathlon, I was hit by a car on my bike. Initially I was okay, it wasn’t until a few days after the trauma I developed an infection near my heart. I was in the hospital for nine days, with additional treatment and monitoring for a month after I was released. That was 16 years ago. I was in my 20s, and that could have been it. End of story. No running, no family, no future. Sometimes I think, what if I had never left that hospital? How would the lives of family members changed, for better or worse?

Trail runners are a scrawny bunch

Consider the life you have lived until now as over, and, as a dead man, see what’s left as a bonus.

This is a powerful idea that you can use, to treat the life you’ve experienced until now as over. You are in the bonus level, additional time, and extra life like in a video game. How would you act differently with this mindset? You were never supposed to get to this point. It’s one of my favorite quotes:

“To win any battle, you must fight as if you are already dead.”

Not to be too morbid, but death is removed from society; it’s hidden, whereas it used to be a huge part of life. In past generations, death was an integral part of daily life. It occurred at home, and funerals were community events, allowing people to confront and discuss loss. Today, however, death often takes place in hospitals or care facilities, away from the public eye. Making death seem more abstract and distant.

Classic line from Clerks

Advances in medicine and healthcare have extended life expectancy, leading many to view death as something that happens in the distant future. This detachment can lead to a lack of appreciation for how short life is and the moments that make it meaningful. Its purpose is to shine light on what is important. That which is limited is desirable. We think of death as this far-off place, and that we all get to grow old. Growing old is a privilege.

There’s another quote I like about death:

“Death doesn’t need to be treated as an enemy to be able to delight in life…I encourage people to make peace with death, to see it as a culminating adventure of this adventure of life. It is not an error, it is not a failure. It is taking off a tight shoe that you’ve worn well.”

– Ram Dass

We wear different “shoes”, or personalities through life. I have chosen the role, of “Ultra Runner”. Death would be the end of that, no longer a charade to impress, or prove anything. There is no failure in death, or a DNF for that matter, and we should stop treating it as such. If you can conquer your fear of death, there’s a power, and a sense of freedom. You can laugh at the absurdity of what life or races throws at you. I think that’s what drives most health-conscious people; a fear of death. It is flipped for me. I try to cultivate more of a joy for life, and I wake each morning reminding myself of this quote:

“I greet every sunrise with cries of joy like a prisoner who is reprieved from death.”

This creates an intense appreciation for those in my life, what I have, and what I get to do. Every run is a gift, to see more vistas and sunrises while I am on the trail, feeling a sense of awe.

Do you even lift bro?

The more you make peace with death and the fear of it, the more it becomes a superpower. While I don’t have a death wish, I use it in running by having a conversation with myself constantly. This idea that I get to be a father, husband, coach. This creates a sense of gratitude for what I achieve. It shouldn’t take a near-death experience for you to do that. Those who brush up against it, who are around death constantly, are empowered by its sense of urgency. It emphasizes faster action, not wasting time.

I vividly remember the video series “Faces of Death” from high school.

Not to be viewed by the elderly ??
rotten.com

I remember being warned how horrible it was, and the site 90’s website Rotten.com. It profiled a lot of the similar content like “Faces of Death”. Maybe death shouldn’t be hidden from children, or society? Locked away in a box that nobody talks about, except those who care for the elderly, or sick. Death should be in and around your life to maximize priorities and relationships. Don’t worry, I’m not about to start showing my kids faces of death, my oldest is 12 and not allowed to watch PG13 😁movies.

Unfortunately death is the one thing us ultra runners can’t outrun. “Memento mori”. I invite you to remember death the next time your feeling low, be it in a race, or in life. You are in the bonus round, you are not dead yet!

I do not fear death. I was dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.

Thanks for reading, if you enjoy this post you may also enjoy what I believe happens when a runner dies. Let me know your thoughts on death in the comments below!

I had also created a little AI trailer for this blog post for fun. Creepy, right?

AI is fun! What will you create?
Ultra Lizard Brain

Ultra Lizard Brain

Published by Patrick Durante on January 12, 2025

I was listening to a podcast about how the lizard brain is still inside us. It developed first, and the larger brain grew from there. The lizard brain can’t speak, and it’s primal. Since it doesn’t communicate with words, it needs basic things and operates on a simple level with less complexity. I started wondering if there’s a better way to live—one that caters more to that lizard brain—in an attempt to make life simpler, be happier, and reduce anxiety or depression. After all, anxiety and depression are often byproducts of a brain that tries to live in the future or ruminate on the past.

So, what does this lizard brain need? Let’s get real basic with it. The lizard needs sunlight, connection with other lizards, natural and simple food, the ability to run from predators, rest, and the chance to do it all again. When you put it like that, it all sounds so simple! The problem is that when this lizard starts interacting with things unnatural to its basic, primal needs, it begins to suffer. The lizard doesn’t care about what car it drives or its social status—it just uses its feet to get from point A to point B. The lizard doesn’t care what its house looks like or what clothes it wears—it’s always butt naked!

Remember, we’re only focusing on basic survival and self-preservation needs here. I’m not trying to add any unnecessary complexity. The lizard just wants to see tomorrow, maybe find a mate, and, if it’s lucky, see some offspring. So, what do I need to give it, day after day, to make sure it keeps moving forward?

As I dug into this idea more, I realized that the lizard brain is always in the moment. It can’t handle an abundance of time—it’s not sitting still long enough to catch the latest episode of its favorite TV show. If it did, it would get eaten.

When I’m running ultras, I feel like I go into lizard brain mode. I’m running from predators, I’m fueling, and I’m just being present in the mile and the moment. I try to force my brain back to simpler times. During a race, there are always unknowns, and the advanced brain doesn’t like that. But the lizard brain thrives in simplicity—it understands clear actions and conditions. The lizard brain wants training it’s seen before, food it’s eaten before, and even shoes for its lizard feet that it’s used before. The lizard brain doesn’t like “new.” It fears the unknown.

To thrive, the lizard brain needs simple, day-to-day living. Run the lizard. Feed the lizard real, alive food. Move the lizard. Get the thinking out of it. The lizard only worries about today—not the past or the future. It takes action on what it can control, not on what Sally the lizard receptionist in accounting thinks about it. Complexity kills—in design, in training, and in making life reproducible.

The lizard brain evolved in the wild, in the forest—not in the city. It needs to get back to nature. Feeling the sun, wind, rain, and dirt connects the lizard runner back to its primal instincts. It thrives in its original environment, where it can roam in wide-open spaces.

The lizard also loves to struggle with its support network of other lizards, training with others who are doing the same thing. The camaraderie of enduring difficult challenges together strengthens bonds and reinforces the lizard’s purpose. The cheering crowds, pacers, and aid stations during a race let the lizard know it’s not alone in this fight for survival.

The basics work for a reason—that’s what I’m saying here. We’ve broken away from simple daily habits that our brains need to function. Where can I remove complexity when it doesn’t need to exist? That’s the core principle of success.

The lizard brain also needs a problem to solve. It thrives on overcoming obstacles and is hardwired to conquer challenges to survive. The lizard brain doesn’t binge-watch Netflix. It gets out and does things. The trail is our survival scenario—a life-or-death struggle, both physically and mentally. This struggle gives the lizard brain a sense of purpose and validation.

The lizard brain wants one task—a single focus. That’s what ultrarunning does: it gives you one task, with the sole purpose of putting one foot in front of the other. The lizard brain can’t multitask, and anyone who says they can is just doing multiple things poorly instead of one thing well.

The lizard brain also pushes through pain. It actually loves pain as a feedback mechanism, using it as a tool to modify behavior. Pain tells the lizard when to slow down, adjust its form, eat more, or take a break. That’s a core survival ability: the ability to endure enough to see another day.

Above all, the lizard brain needs a reason to keep going. It needs a clear goal, like a finish line, where it can be rewarded. The lizard thrives on the satisfaction of being tested, pushed to its limits, and becoming something more than its current self.

So, the lizard brain needs its basic fuel, rest, safety, movement, connection, and purpose. Ultrarunning, in many ways, strips life down to these core elements and satisfies the primal brain’s instincts while aligning them with a modern challenge—with guardrails in place to keep it manageable. We might not like it, but it’s all very simple. I see this when I watch squirrels or other mammals surviving in the wild. This all runs through my mind as I sit watching out my window with my plethora of problems, while they live in the moment, just trying to survive.

I sit on my couch worrying about a future that might never come or a past that doesn’t matter. I need to get back to simpler times. Simple. How do I just make it simple? What would this look like if it were easy? That’s always the question to ask yourself.